Leadership Briefs: Building A Personal Values Playbook

Clarity gets easier when you can name what you stand for. We’re launching our Leader Briefs with a fast, practical guide to defining three to five personal values and turning them into simple behaviors you can practice when stakes are high and time is short. Instead of vague aspirations, we walk through a concrete flow: capture peak moments across your life, translate the feelings and patterns you notice into candidate values, and refine a long list down to a focused core you can remember and use.

We dig into why values act as guardrails for decisions, how they cut burnout by reducing default yeses, and why they offer clarity when emotions run hot. You’ll hear examples from our own lists—integrity, acceptance, relationships, growth, empathy, creativity, joy, fun, exploration—and how we define them in action with “I show this when…” statements. We also talk about grouping related terms into themes so your shortlist reflects what truly matters without bloating into a feel-good catalog. The aim is a compass you can carry, not a poster you forget.

Then we put values to work. Borrowing Octavia Butler’s reminder that habit beats inspiration, we show how to precommit small, repeatable actions: choose empathy in the first minute of a tense exchange, ship a creative draft before perfect, protect time blocks for family, or take one bold step when imposter syndrome bites. We cover review rhythms, how values can evolve with life stages, and why sharing your list with your team builds trust, speeds decisions, and invites mutual accountability. Ready for a quick win that pays off every day? Press play, pick your five, define the behaviors, and practice one habit this week. If this helped, follow the show, share it with a friend, and tell us your top value in a review or on LinkedIn.

Download toolkit here:  https://shared.outlook.inky.com/link?domain=katieervin.com&t=h.eJxFjk0OwiAYRK_SsNbyIaVAV70KbWkh5S8UTYzx7oqauJzJvJd5oGt2aGiQKSUdA8a7KlbrfLOhnaPHTqtF58PYdE7GunjEZO4YnRq0VyroEvNGgHVMSPjC47z8qI9BAlsJ7WCWSgLn60W8M6cUYBKMcYkJ75kgAji0nSCk57TqddVr71U7ORV2HeqHcfPKuqqtk6VO_s3zBfLTPk4.MEUCIQCLROhZh5t9XgiLOTP7UVJtl06zFs5hrP0QgNy_I2fAHgIgKyX12bPRQwli0jo3mr2Yyp1fE5_i-5k_OtxCN3Sagec

Follow us on LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/in/rhondajhale/ and https://www.linkedin.com/in/katieervin/

www.jolyean.com

www.katieervin.com

Measure what matters. Lead with purpose. Take the LEADERs Catalyst Index: https://katieervin.com/catalyst-score/

Theme music by Emma Jo https://emmajo.rocks/

Chapters

• 0:00 Kicking Off Leader Briefs
• 1:59 Why Personal Values Matter
• 3:11 Mapping Peak Moments And Lessons
• 6:00 From Value Lists To Shortlists
• 8:42 Grouping Themes And Letting Values Evolve
• 10:37 Define Values As Behaviors
• 12:32 Habit Over Inspiration
• 13:47 Action Steps And Sharing Your Values
• 16:17 What’s Next And Closing

Transcript

Dr. Katie: 1:04

Back to the path to leadership. I'm Dr. Katie. And I'm Rhonda Jolene Hale. And we are so excited to have you back. And today we are kicking off, as promised, what we are calling leader briefs. These are the short, powerful episodes where we're going to give you some very succinct steps to build a skill in 15 minutes or less.

SPEAKER_01: 1:25

Yep, we're going to do it. Get that timer ready. We are talking about defining your values. We understand that a lot of companies have values, but not maybe everybody knows their own values. And even if you do, I reassess my values constantly. So we want to give you some tactics that you can use.

Dr. Katie: 1:43

And we talked about this before. This is often skipped. We know we stand for something, but we don't take this step to do it. And really, if you don't know what you stand for, it's very hard to lead with clarity and consistency or even confidence sometimes. Step one, why do values matter? We've talked about this. They're really those guardrails for decision making, which is so important. Reducing that burnout and overwhelmed feeling because we're saying yes to everything without really making decisions on what we stand for. They give us clarity when our emotions run high. They shape culture and they also anchor our leadership philosophy. Who do we want to be, both at home and at work?

SPEAKER_01: 2:28

I think about it as you can do it professionally, personally, like you said. And they help me make all my big decisions and hopefully we'll help you listen to your gut more often.

Dr. Katie: 2:39

Let's jump into step by step how we do this. So, really, step one is looking back to really identify peak moments. And I know you had some great examples of that, Rhonda.

SPEAKER_01: 2:52

Yes. I keep a list of peak moments or meaningful moments in my life. I go all the way back to elementary school when I got picked to sing my very first solo in elementary and first grade. And these are times that mean a lot to you. They can be times that stick out in your mind. That's a memory that I recall very easily. These could be accomplishments in high school. These could be early career accomplishments, very recent things. These can also be things that you're really proud of in your home life. Maybe you're a very proud parent. You're a very proud pet parent. These can be things that you are occasional things, very quick instances, but again, they can be ongoing things. What you want to do is take your meaningful moments and jot down a list or put a list into your computer. Think about when you were proud, when you felt frustrated, or times when you made a huge, great decision and you needed to do that and you felt great. Then you want to think about what value did that meaningful moment or that pink moment, what values came out of that? I often start with how did I feel? I felt proud, I felt happy, what did I really appreciate about myself? Maybe I appreciated that experience. Maybe I appreciated the storytelling that I did. Or maybe for you, you appreciated that you were a team player or that you were a great organizer. Then you think about how you honored those values that you might have. You can also think about these things in the negative. Maybe you already know that your values, you have a value of family. And there was a time where you worked more than you should have and you violated that family value. Maybe that's a lesson learned. And you want to take that lesson learned and think, okay, that wasn't so much a peak moment. That wasn't a meaningful moment for me. You could also take a list and have a list of things of lessons learned versus those meaningful or peak moments for you. And then that will set us up once you have your lists. And again, I keep these ongoing. I keep them in an analog notebook, but you can keep them on your phone, on your computer, and you're gonna build on them as you experience life. And then Katie's gonna walk us through how we can actually define and refine words that can become our list of values.

Dr. Katie: 5:28

It's so important because I love talking about those moments because really our values show up in those emotional moments. That's really where they bubble to the surface and reflecting on those. And I love that you keep them in a notebook. I keep a spreadsheet of it. Then off to the side, you can really start thinking about what were the values, what were the things that showed up in those moments. We've talked before. You can also Google a list of values. We're gonna have a download that people can use that has a list. There's so many great lists of values out there. I used the Brene Brown's list, but thinking about that. And so I encourage people, once you think about those moments, then get a list of values and pick 15 or 20 that really resonate with you. We're gonna see words like integrity and growth and courage and family creativity. There's just gonna be all kinds of words, and they're gonna have all of those. And then what I encourage people to do is then really sit with those words for a little while. And if you start with 15, cross out five and then cross out another five. And when I do this in my sessions, people typically struggle to get down to three to five, but it really helps us hone in because we we really've got to to figure that out. And to me, if everything is is important, then nothing is important. We've really got to focus on that. We're not trying to impress anyone. This is your personal values, which are so important.

SPEAKER_01: 7:05

And to that point, that doesn't mean that just because integrity is not on your list of values, you don't care about integrity. These are just how you generally define every decision that you make. Like you said, Katie, you can't, we can't have 30,000 words on our values list because then we know won't know where to go, what decision to make. And I was one of those people that used to have a list of 20 values, and that was very difficult for me to remember. I think it was Brene Brown who said, if you cannot list out your values, if somebody asks you what they are, you have too many values. I try to keep under five, and that's what I try to recommend to people as well. And when I first did this exercise, it was very difficult because I thought, oh, I love all these words and I try to body all these things. That's an excellent point that you make.

Dr. Katie: 7:58

I encourage people to really group them into themes too. When you have your 15 to 20, start looking at those themes and what's getting pulled through. And words are going to look different for everybody. What it resonates with you and our values are going to change a little bit. So when we're early in career, maybe before we have kids or partners or anything like that, family may not be a value. Then as we grow in in our personal and professional life, it may switch. And that's okay. We're not running it out and tattooing it on our body. It's we want to keep reflecting on this, which you made that point, which I think is so important.

SPEAKER_01: 8:35

I like the idea of grouping them into themes because then because creativity is a great example. Everyone knows that's one of my values, but that to me can also mean innovation. It doesn't just have to mean creativity. It also can mean experimentation. Experimentation doesn't have to be exactly one of my values, but maybe it's one of yours, and that means something completely different than creativity. And that's okay. I really like the idea of sitting with values for how long do you make that recommendation to sit with the 15 to 20?

Dr. Katie: 9:09

When I do it in in class, you give them three to five minutes. But then after I always give them the homework to go back and to reflect. And I think it takes time to really get it right. Maybe a week, it may be a couple weeks, but you you want to get it right. So you wanna you don't want to rush through it.

SPEAKER_01: 9:28

I agree with that. And then after you've sat with it, you'll want to choose those top three to five values. If you can't repeat them to people, then you either don't know your values or you have too many.

Dr. Katie: 9:40

We talked about this in the last podcast, but mine are acceptance, integrity, relationships, and growth. Those are the ones that resonate with me. They've been my values for a couple of years now. And every year when I review them, it's like, nope, that's still right on point.

SPEAKER_01: 9:57

It's so funny that integrity, it's not funny that integrity is one of yours, but it doesn't surprise me because one of mine is also integrity and we connect a lot on that. Yeah. But mine are integrity, empathy, creativity, joy, and fun. I group those two together as one. And then also exploration.

Dr. Katie: 10:19

So I love that. The joy and fun is just it's it's so you. So well, and what I like about that is once you have the your words, then you really define what each value looks like in action. Yeah. What does it look like? What are the behaviors? What is this? Integrity might be. I show this value when I keep my commitments, even when I'm in convenience or family. I show up this way when I'm protecting my time for the people that matter. Actually, just saying that takes it to that next step. It's not just words, it's not just a poster we slap on the wall, but it's actually those anchors of the values of what we really are.

SPEAKER_01: 11:00

I love that we are aligning each with what it looks like in action because a lot of times people will come to me and say, I don't know how to utilize my values. Is it just with decisions? When you put that visual of that action in, that makes it completely real. It makes it so that people understand how they can utilize it day to day. And then it makes values very important for people. And for me, when we think about the alignment check-in, I have an amazing quote from Octavia E. Butler. And she talks about how we can't just think about being inspired by, and she's not directly talking about values, but she's talking about writing actually, and how if you want to become a writer, you can't just wait to be inspired. If we take this and apply this to our values, for me, I can't just wait around and think, well, when's my value of creativity gonna show up? I love this. She talks about first forget inspiration. Habit is more dependable. Habit will sustain you whether you're inspired or not. Habit will help you finish and polish your stories. Inspiration won't. Habit is persistence in practice. I love that. I love that too. And what that says to me when I think about my values is I choose, for example, last time we talked a lot about burnout in our previous podcast. But when I'm in the midst of a sad mood, when I'm in the midst of feeling burnout, I choose creativity before anything else. That is my habit in persistence. And for me, I also choose empathy number one when it comes to people. That helps me be connected to folks more than anything else. And you can go down the line and say, how do I habitually want to show up in life? That is also a great question to ask yourself when you want to think about what you hold true and what you value.

Dr. Katie: 13:10

Yeah, I think it's so important. And I think that really tying it into real life, like paying attention to that. I made a LinkedIn post this week about doing things when your voice shakes. And that that lays into my growth value. It's doing things scared. It's doing big and bold things. It's showing up when that little voice in your head and that imposter syndrome kicks in. I don't know if we should do this. It's really scary. Do it anyways, and moving forward in doing that. And that's where my growth really shows up is doing really scary things sometimes.

SPEAKER_01: 13:45

A great quote is Susan Kane. She writes a lot about emotions and emotional intelligence. And she says, courage is not the absence of fear. Courage is fear walking. I love it.

Dr. Katie: 13:57

I love that quote. That is so perfect. So perfect. We said we would pay attention to time for the people that know us. It's really hard for Rhonda and I because we want to have all kinds of side conversations on this. But I mean, in closing, you all now have work to do. We said we're going to give you the guardrails and the guidelines. And now you have work to do. First step is to really think about the things you're proud of, the things that Rhonda talked about, because values, again, not just a pretty poster on the wall. They're the promises that you make to yourself. They're the way you're going to show up.

SPEAKER_01: 14:32

Yes. And then we want you to pick your three to five values, and we want you to define what they look like in action. And then this week, check in with yourself and see how they feel, if they feel true to you.

Dr. Katie: 14:45

It's so perfect. I always think that one of the most important things is to share your values once you have them. When you know what you stand for, leadership gets a whole lot clearer. We really invite you to share your values with the people that work with you, work for you, work around you, with your peers and your partners. And we would really love you to share it on LinkedIn. Come and share with us what your values are because we would love to hear about the work that you did this week.

SPEAKER_01: 15:18

I love the idea of sharing with your leadership, your team, sharing up and down, managing up and down. You could share it on the reviews on our podcast if you'd like. You can share it on LinkedIn. And then also, I think that it's really great when you when you share your values, then people can reflect and react to them. And then they'll start to question their own values. I see it all the time. And then you can also hand off the worksheets that's going to be in the show notes to other people and help them define their values.

Dr. Katie: 15:52

You do the homework. And then if you know someone doesn't have the podcast, share it with them, have them do it. It'll be a fun activity. And next week we're going to talk about probably our favorite subjects, which is the importance of pausing to celebrate. Whether it's the holidays, whether it's personal accomplishments or professional accomplishments or organizational accomplishments. It's so important for us to take that time. So thank you for joining us on this week's Path to Leadership and our new leadership briefs. We can't wait to hear from you. And we will talk to you next time on the path to leadership. Bye, everyone. Bye, y'all.